March 31, 2008

Volume 104, Issue 51

Stories from the March 31, 2008 issue of the GW Hatchet. View a PDF version of this issue.

Amid jeers, Rove speaks to YAF

Republican strategist Karl Rove was unfazed by two separate interruptions from protesters calling him a war criminal as he spoke about the 2008 election in front of a sold-out crowd at the Elliott School of International Affairs Friday night. The first interruption came five minutes into Rove’s remarks, when an unidentified male stood up and […]

April Fool’s Issue: Campus Calendar

Reader’s note: This story is satirical in nature and published in a spoof issue. Monday Sexaholics Anonymous Meeting Come join us for a night of discussion about the immense joys of sex and the lack of any consequences. 9 p.m. to 11 p.m. Marvin Center Grand Ballroom Sponsored by S.L.U.T.S. Tuesday Planned Parenthood In a […]

For seniors, the run is done

GREENSBORO, N.C., March 30 – Sitting in front of media after her sixth-seeded GW women’s basketball team was eliminated from the NCAA tournament by second-seeded Rutgers University Sunday afternoon, senior Kim Beck got choked up when trying to sum up her four years as a Colonial. It was a rare moment for the point guard, […]

Nats finally find a home

It took 22 months, 450 truckloads of dirt per day, 25 miles of pilling and 3,500 pieces of steel. But after more than $600 million of public funding the nomadic Washington Nationals finally have a place to call home. Nearly two years of digging brought out a glistening diamond from decrepit dust. The construction of […]

April Fool’s Issue: Trach is “Client No. 8”

Reader’s note: This story is satirical in nature and published in a spoof issue. FBI documents obtained by The Hatchet revealed the prostitution ring which brought down the governor of New York also brought down former University President Stella Joke Trachtenomorejob. Identified as “Client No. 8,” Trachtenomorejob frequented the President’s Club VIP on GW’s dime. […]

Trachtenberg speaks to Hillel international conference

Former University President Stephen Joel Trachtenberg spoke fondly of his experiences with Hillel during an address he gave at the organization’s national summit on universities and the Jewish community. Trachtenberg said during his presidency, he aimed to create ties between communities that otherwise would have had little contact. One of his “fondest memories at GW” […]

April Fool’s Issue: Coach boots self from team

Reader’s note: This story is satirical in nature and published in a spoof issue. Head men’s basketball coach Carl Chobbs has kicked himself off the team for violating an unspecified team rule, The Pussy has learned. A source said that athletic director Yack Nopants will make the announcement later this week at a press conference. […]

RHA and GreenGW work to conserve energy

GreenGW and the Residence Hall Association organized a contest this month to encourage students to conserve energy, but only a small amount of students are competing. More than a month has past in the Eco-Challenge and a few dozen students are competing to reduce residence hall water and electricity usage and to promote “the conservation […]