Slice of Life: Surrendering to the winter break black hole

Winter break is upon us, and with it comes almost a full month of unadulterated free time. With such free time we enter the black hole danger zone. You know, the black hole that sucks away your days and creates a hodgepodge of TV movies, Christmas cookies and endless internet surfing. Some accept the black hole of winter break as their fate, some fight it with all of their might.

There are three schools of thought on this subject:

1. Those who believe winter break is best spent sitting on the couch, eating meatballs and getting through every movie or TV show waiting for them on their Netflix queue. They dive into the black hole.

2. Those who believe that winter break is a time to get ahead on reading, on classes and that online course they’re taking to stimulate their brain.

3. Those who fake productivity and are just as lazy as the people who own their meatball eating and Netflix watching.

Speaking on behalf of myself and the rest of GW’s often overzealous, overachieving student body, I would like to make the gross overgeneralization that most of fall into category number 3.

Sure, there’s always the initial laziness. The moment you get home and you realize that this night will be the night that you will finally be asleep at 4 a.m. instead of staring at carved out curse words in a Gelman cubicle. There’s no fault in cherishing that feeling. There’s no fault in sleeping until 11:30 a.m.

Those first recovery days are most likely spent the same way by all: in sweatpants, on the couch and in front of the television. It is then that there is no shame in being in the first school of thought.

It is the fourth morning that sets apart the doers from the snoozers. Because the fourth day is when the stir crazy go stir crazy and the schlubs continue to schlub. The fourth morning is where all of us GW try hards will pull out our ‘to read’ lists and our syllabi for next semester and get cracking. It is then that we cast shame on our less-motivated winter break counterparts.

But first Facebook.

And then Reddit.

Open GWork.

Breakfast? Thanks Mom!

Next, midday “Sex and the City” on E! or your third “SportsCenter” Top 10 plays watch for the day.

Finally, type in your GWork username as your mother calls you for dinner.

Thus begins the endless cycle of winter break’s black hole.

Everyday you make to-do lists with “carpe diem” at the top, and “update resume,” and “apply for dream summer internship in a spectacular city,” right below it. Everyday you end up sitting on the couch with your father watching reruns of “MASH” as he asks you what you’ve done.

Did you just sit on the couch?

To that, you look at him with offense. You wrote a list. You opened GWork. You couldn’t find that password with all the numbers and exclamation points that you’re pretty sure they create so no one does remember. You watched “Friends” with your sister. You napped. You’re still in the sweatpants you put on on Sunday night. It’s Tuesday.

But, it’s okay because you have a list and tomorrow is another day brimming with potential.

Let’s face it – we’re those kids who pretend to be doing a lot without doing anything at all. Let’s own it this winter break. Watch all of “Lost,” reread “Harry Potter,” stay glued to your bed. Don’t answer your phone. Don’t shower. Do you.

And for all of you still too self-important to own your laziness, don’t get too upset when the rest of us do.

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