Sex Column: The truth about faking it

Faking it is the ultimate deception, the naked lie, the pinnacle of bedroom theatrics. The suspicion has a habit of lingering in the afterglow. For women, it’s their little secret. For men, the proof is in the pudding. A study, conducted at the University of Kansas last year, on the practice of faking orgasms produced some surprising results that could leave both men and women curious as to the legitimacy of their sexual partner’s “O” moment – especially for those who are in relationships.

Roughly one in every two women and one in every four men have faked it. Those numbers shouldn’t be anything too scandalous in comparison to other revelations. The truly startling statistic refers to the context in which sexual treachery occurs. When it comes down to falsifying an orgasm you are overwhelmingly more likely to do it with a boyfriend or girlfriend. Fifty-three percent of the male fakes and a staggering 78 percent of the female fakes happened during sex with their significant other.

This has little to do with the higher quantity of sex had while in a relationship and more to do with motive. Second only to generally wanting sex to end, the number one reason people listed for having a phony climax is to avoid insulting their partner or to foster a sense of accomplishment and normalcy.

Beyond the obvious downside of not cuming, faking it can be detrimental to a relationship. You wouldn’t want your genitals caught in anything, especially a lie. No matter how repetitive, it rings true that open communication is the key to a successful relationship. If your partner isn’t getting you there, tell him or her. It’s easier than trying to pull off the goofy contortion of an O-face.

Both men and women display separate hallmarks when faking an orgasm. Women tend to act out climax by breathing harder and moaning excessively. Men are more likely to directly lie about cuming or falsely praise their partners after the performance.

The trend of both sexes, however, is the assurance of initiation. Statistically, you can rest assured that your partner had an orgasm if the suspected faker initiated the sex. A mere 13 percent of men and an even smaller 6 percent of women who faked it did it when they were the instigator.

As long as impatience, laziness and fatigue exist there will be the need to fake it.

The vast majority of fake orgasms occur simply because an individual wants the sex to end. For the sake of self-confidence, I hope that it isn’t too hard to pull off an Oscar-worthy performance.

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