The Valentine’s Day mascot is a miserable little boy throwing arrows at people, forcing them into love. There are two things to take away from this. First, we need someone to force us to fall in love. Second, cupid is male.

Cupid’s sex is perhaps the single most ironic thing about Valentine’s Day. In reality, a crazed chick with wings tossing arrows down making humankind swoon is a lot closer to what is actually witnessed on Valentine’s Day. V-Day is arguably a total lady holiday. Who else could convince the world that it’s reasonable to buy $100 worth of flowers that will die within 2 days?

And yet cupid is male, so the irony continues. While some ladies throw themselves into the holiday with full force, equal as many guys recoil with just as much fervor. I have recently noticed – and this is not just me being a bitter single gal, my friends in relationships agree – that the concept of Valentine’s Day makes some guys squirmy. These guys go crazy and start running around in all directions avoiding both relationships and the color red.

But it’s not entirely their fault.

As ladies, we turn Valentine’s Day into a tornado of expectations; it becomes the day where everything turns around. If we’re single, we start to believe that the guy who only texts us on the weekends will suddenly want a relationship. If we’re taken, it’s the day our guy makes us a scrapbook and does our dishes.

Seriously? A calendar date isn’t going to change anything and our expectations only make it worse.

There are exceptions, but I don’t feel like talking about them because they know who they are; those cute normal couples whose first names begin with the same letter.

But the rest of us need to calm down. Maybe if there wasn’t so much build-up and pressure around this holiday, we could all actually enjoy it. Like St. Patrick’s Day. Now there’s a nice cheesy, sleazy, meaningless holiday we can all revel in. So this year maybe give Valentine’s Day a break and cut your (non)significant other some slack. Who knows? You might just love it.