Serving the GW Community since 1904

The GW Hatchet

AN INDEPENDENT STUDENT NEWSPAPER SERVING THE GW COMMUNITY SINCE 1904

The GW Hatchet

Serving the GW Community since 1904

The GW Hatchet

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PAUL closes in Western Market
By Ella Mitchell, Staff Writer • April 22, 2024

Slice of Life: Wacky weather woes

I’m not normally one to make assumptions, but based on my recent experience, I’m forced to believe that Mother Nature is on crack.

And dressing appropriately for her addiction is a battle I lose everyday.

Weather.com is my crutch in times like these, but it isn’t of much help to me when it tells me the low is 55 degrees and the high is 97. I know what you’re thinking: Why don’t you just dress in layers? But actually, I hope you aren’t thinking that. Everyone knows that in college, every unnecessary item of clothing brings you that much closer to the day when you unknowingly run out of options.

The real treat, though, has been the unexpected downpours that may or may not be nature’s way of telling me to shower more often. I can never tell if it’s raining just from looking out my window – not that I don’t love my beautiful view of a brick wall – so I am forced to use my intuition.

I can recall one day in particular when a thunderstorm really put a damper on my life. What started off as a warm October evening and a trip to Gelman with a friend ended in a sudden deluge of rain.

It was like Noah’s Ark out there. My feet, which were covered only by the straps of my flip-flops, were totally submerged in water. My friend criticized me for my choice of footwear, but I reminded her that there are no rain boot options for guys that don’t make us look like Boots from “Dora the Explorer.”

After a brief argument over the sluttiness of Dora’s new look, we made it to the library. We swam up to the fourth floor and chose a table by the window. Then, shortly after sitting down, we heard something dripping. Two seconds later, we heard it again. The ceiling was leaking.

“Oh look,” my friend said to me. “It’s dripping right on top of the electrical outlet!”

I laughed and made a poorly crafted “Final Destination” joke – though I periodically checked for sparks and falling debris for the remainder of my time there.

But after five minutes of diligent work, the color of my seafoam green highlighter began to fade before my eyes. It had run out of ink. You know you’re having a good night when the only part of you that’s dry is your highlighter.

The thought of reading my biology textbook without taking persistent breaks to highlight a line I hadn’t actually absorbed seemed unbearable at the time. As I left the library to study in my dorm, I put on my hood only to see that the rain had stopped.

With my troubles behind me, I breathed in the fresh, clean air and was finally able to appreciate nature’s blessings. Then my 4-RIDE arrived.

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