April Fools’ Issue: Staff Editorial: The Checklist

Reader’s note: This story is satirical in nature and published in a spoof issue.

Twice a week we get together and tell you the same shit over and over. Well we’re tired of it and you’re tired of it, so we are just going to give you a list, check whatever the hell you think is important.

More transparency

More University spending

[ X ] Less University spending

More student responsibility

For the Science and Engineering Complex

[ X ] Against the Science and Engineering Complex

More student input

Schemin’ Steven should spend more time talking to students

[ X ] Make Gelman better

[ X ] Jay Avenue sucks

[ X ] CCAS advising sucks,

[ X ] No really, CCAS advising sucks

[ X ] SA sucks

[ X ] Puppies?

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