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The GW Hatchet

AN INDEPENDENT STUDENT NEWSPAPER SERVING THE GW COMMUNITY SINCE 1904

The GW Hatchet

Serving the GW Community since 1904

The GW Hatchet

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Officials name senior vice president, chief of staff
By Fiona Riley, Assistant News Editor • March 26, 2024

April Fools’ Issue: Staff Editorial: The Checklist

Reader’s note: This story is satirical in nature and published in a spoof issue.

Twice a week we get together and tell you the same shit over and over. Well we’re tired of it and you’re tired of it, so we are just going to give you a list, check whatever the hell you think is important.

More transparency

More University spending

[ X ] Less University spending

More student responsibility

For the Science and Engineering Complex

[ X ] Against the Science and Engineering Complex

More student input

Schemin’ Steven should spend more time talking to students

[ X ] Make Gelman better

[ X ] Jay Avenue sucks

[ X ] CCAS advising sucks,

[ X ] No really, CCAS advising sucks

[ X ] SA sucks

[ X ] Puppies?

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