Leaders of the College Republicans and the College Democrats engaged in the ultimate political jousting match Monday, temporarily switching roles to trade satirical jabs about party stereotypes in the Marvin Center.
Dressed as a “Democrat,” CR Chairman Brand Kroeger wore a pink- and white-striped shirt, neon green blazer, Ugg boots and aviators, with a rainbow flag draped over his shoulders. The “Republican,” CD President Cory Struble, carried an American flag and wore a navy tie, checkered blazer, red suspenders, topsiders and a flag lapel pin.
Students dressed as Anderson Cooper and Campbell “No Bias, No Bull” Brown moderated the event in front of about 275 students in the Marvin Center Amphitheater. The event was sponsored by the Political Satire Living and Learning Cohort, which is in its second year at GW.
“It was hysterical and all in good fun,” said sophomore Michael Komo, a member of the LLC who played Cooper. “We need to be able to laugh at ourselves.”
Kroeger, who had an intentional lisp for the evening, played a flamboyant man with a deep love for Barney Frank, “vegan hippies” and fighting for animal rights.
“Barney Frank is a whole lot of man,” Kroeger said. “He could bail my bank out any time he wants.”
Struble, who affected a Southern accent for the night, expressed his love for Ann Coulter and fighting for abstinence and against global warming.
When asked to name his favorite member of the U.S. Senate, Struble said, “Larry Craig, because of his wide stance on the issues. We’ll miss him in the Senate.”
Playing into political stereotypes, Kroeger apologized for not showering in a few weeks, but promised to bathe “in the next couple of days.” Struble described his ideal date as eating “chicken fried steak with gravy while watching ‘Hannity’s America.’ “
When Kroeger promoted a “spread the wealth around” position on taxes, Struble described the Republican budget as “17 pages with no numbers so you don’t have to think about it.”
Asked how President Obama is performing in his first 100 days in office, the men had very different responses.
“I don’t believe Obama is president,” Struble said. “He wasn’t sworn in using the oath of office of the Constitution, and he’s not an American-born citizen. I want him to fail, because if he fails, America wins.”
“Michelle Obama just planted a garden at the White House,” Kroeger responded. “Malia and Sasha got a swing set that was slipped into the stimulus bill, and they’ve had a fabulous trip to Europe.”
Kroeger and Struble were given the questions in advance, and their responses were met with almost continuous hysterical laughter from the crowd.
At one point Kroeger said to Struble, “You’re even racist against penguins, and they’re black and white.”
“It was fantabulously hilarious,” said sophomore Shannon Bradley, a member of the LLC, after the debate had finished. “Brand kept up his lisp very well.”
This article appeared in the April 9, 2009 issue of the Hatchet.