April: This month in live music

Turn your charm on, ladies and gents. Music this April is set to leave you wondering why you haven’t kept up with “that kid you used to be friends with who always buys tickets to everything.” Oh, and whether or not Dolly Parton is, ahem, a screamer.

Take advantage of Spring Fling (free!), and get down with Gym Class Heroes this Saturday, on GW’s dime.

Life got you down? Chin up, kid! Join co-headliners Jay-Z and Mary J. Blige at the Verizon Center Sunday in support of their “Heart of the City” tour. And don’t despair if you’re strapped for cash, my little GWorld worm. Tickets are priced from $49 to $1500, so there is a spot for all levels of indulgence.

Have a heart and give back! Drop $10 at Black Cat April 8 to support the National Coalition for the Homeless by jamming away society’s ills with The Beanstalk Library, your GW brethren Bottles/Cans and PS24.

Weren’t quick enough on tickets for electronica Brits Hot Chip? Get ready to charm someone’s pants off. Hit up “that kid” and make nice so as to not be left out of going to the show April 11 at 9:30 Club.

Ah! Nothing’s more palatable to us young sophisticates than our sweet pretension. Drop $28 to fulfill commitment to your enviable GW-branded intellectualism by joining The Decemberists’ frontman Colin Meloy April 13 at the 9:30 Club. Or for those (pretentiously) avoiding pretension show your District friends love and hit up Rock and Roll Hotel that same night for a lower-priced ($10) rock-sesh with These United States.

If you can, score a pass to one of two sold-out nights of indie relevance when The New Pornographers and Okkervil River take to the 9:30 Club April 14 and 15.

Ladies: looking to stay fly? Join oh-my-God-so-“Complicated”-and-simply-the-best Avril Lavigne at the Patriot Center April 15, with openers Boys Like Girls. The price for such girl power? Loss of street-cred.loss of $42.

9:30 Club is sold out? AGAIN? Make nicey-nice with “that kid” (AGAIN?) since you’ll need to score a ticket to see British MTV darling Kate Nash there April 17; and Metal Machine Music/Velvet, the underground God in sunglasses Lou Reed on April 22; and pop ballad chick Sara Bareilles April 28.

Feelin’ D.C. flavor? Head to Rock and Roll Hotel to pump the jams with Exit Clov April 19. And, honestly, buy your own tickets this time. No one likes a leech.

Repent for your friendly insincerity and find authentic experience with low-fi indie rock lads Tapes ‘n Tapes when they take 9:30 Club April 23. Tick Tapes ‘n Tapes when they take 9:30 Club April 23. Tickets are $15. Appreciate a $12 Canadian counterpoint to Lady Lavigne? Hit Black Cat April 25 for the so-less-“complicated” Dan Bajar of Destroyer.

Beehives ready? For $40 (plus, um, $3 for hairspray) you can tell mom that you saw her favorites-a-go-go The B-52s at 9:30 Club April 26.

Also, be sure to catch “Backwoods Barbie” (not a porno title). Want proof? Join Dolly Parton as she performs in support of her most recent release at Patriot Center April 28. Tickets range from $45 to $75.

“When Life Gives You Lemons You Paint Washington D.C. Gold,” says hip-hop head Atmosphere, set to hit 9:30 Club April 29. For a ticket, drop $20, not your glass of lemonade.

Finish off the month like any successful young, educated and relevant GW kid: get oppositional by shelling out $17 to see punk rock legends Anti-Flag at 9:30 Club April 30.

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