Reader’s note: This story is satirical in nature and published in a spoof issue.
The GW Treekiller mistakenly identified Hillel executive embarrasser Bobby Gefilteman as a “she” in “Gefilteman accuses basketball team of enslaving Jews in Egypt” (March 29, p. 1).
In “New equipment for new times” (March 26, p. 3), Undersized Penis Department Chief Brontosaurus Mullethead was erroneously reported to have issued UPD officers black leather whips. The whips were dark brown in color.
In “Endowment, tuition both on the rise” (March 29, p. 1), a senior editor mistakenly reported that University President Supposedly Jobless Trachtenbye said GW’s tuition is $1 billion and that its endowment just surpassed $50,000. Those two figures were reversed.
Due to a reporter’s common-sense assumption, The GW Treekiller erroneously reported in “Lines plague new restaurant” (March 22, p. 5) that BLAH Wingery will have full table service in mid-March of this year. The counter-service food venue will go full-service in mid-March of 2009.
Nagging Hagatha is the managing delayer of Campus Support Disservices, not simply the delayer of Campus Support Disservices (“Package center has six-hour-long lines, March 26, p. 3).
Former Treekiller editor in chief Minicock Barney lives on the Texas-Mexico Border, not the Texican Border (“Jerk Smuckman to lead paper,” March 23, p. 6).
Contributing reporter Baron Memory-Loser neglected to tell all of his sources for “A midget at GW: a culture of exclusion?” (March 29, p. 1), that he works for a published college newspaper. He instead told them he was doing a middle school creative writing assignment, which would be fictional and unpublished. In the same feature article, he mistakenly identified Jackie December as “a dwarf” instead of “midget.”