Serving the GW Community since 1904

The GW Hatchet

AN INDEPENDENT STUDENT NEWSPAPER SERVING THE GW COMMUNITY SINCE 1904

The GW Hatchet

Serving the GW Community since 1904

The GW Hatchet

NEWSLETTER
Sign up for our twice-weekly newsletter!

GW nets Ohio phenom

Ohio prep phenom Hegot Games decided to forgo his rookie year in the NBA yesterday to play basketball at GW in a move that head coach Karl Sobbs called “an act of God.”

Nobody really knows why Games chose GW over the NBA or Duke, Arizona or even Duquesne for that matter.

“GW is gonna get me ready for the pros,” Games said. “I looked at its track record over the years, and this place has produced a bunch of NBA all-stars. Yinka Dare, SirValiant Brown, Shawnta Rogers – those are the types of guys I model my game after.”

While many college basketball insiders say the recruiting skills Sobbs developed at UConn may have influenced Games’ choice of GW, Sobbs disagreed.

“You’re fucking kidding, right?” Sobbs said when told of Games’ decision. “I didn’t even recruit the guy. I just nodded my head and forced a smile.”

Athletic Director Jack Nopantz’s only comment was, “Cha-ching!!!!”

Nike and Adidas officials, however, called the signing “a sacrilege.”

“I spent last night crying and watching Pretty Woman with a huge bowl of Ben and Jerry’s,” Nike CEO Workers Plight said. “I couldn’t handle thinking about all the six-year-old Malaysians who will lose their jobs because his shoes won’t be manufactured in our sweat shops.”

More to Discover
Donate to The GW Hatchet