Q: The weekend before Thanksgiving I got completely trashed and revealed something really personal about one of my best friends. “Sarah’s” secret spread around, and now she’s furious at whoever slipped. She has no idea it was me, and instead thinks it’s another friend of ours. I feel so guilty, but I’m terrified if I admit the truth to Sarah she won’t want to be friends with me anymore. What do I do? Do I tell her it was me who slipped? Or do I just keep my mouth shut and let someone else take the blame? ~Guilty
Chick: Yuck. As much as you’ll hate me for this one, all arrows point to admitting that it was you who let the cat out of the bag. Sure, you probably could get away with it, but you could also be eaten away by guilt. Growing up means taking responsibility for the times you mess up and to truly be a good friend you should come clean and spare your other friend the blame of something you know she’s innocent of. It’s only fair to Sarah and to your other friend getting the blame. And if Sarah does get angry, she has every right to be, but hopefully she’ll realize that you did make the right decision to confess. It’s going to be rough, but I promise that you’d regret it more if you didn’t say anything.
Dick: Obviously morals aren’t a huge concern for you if you even have to ask. I see no reason why she needs to know its you because morals aren’t always of highest concern to me either. Is this a way that she may figure it out, do you “slip” when you are drunk a lot? Do you often do stuff, or say stuff you regret, that would make you an obvious suspect for betraying her? If not, than I suggest you slow your roll, stop stressing and just forget about it. Honestly, is this like a national secret or is it about how she did something silly while hooking up with some insignificant guy? I feel like you are giving this issue way to much weight and thought, it’s just a friend.
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Q: One of my best friend’s boyfriends who I’ve always had a crush on recently came onto me after my friend passed out in her apartment. We have a class together and he’s always been pretty flirty with me and now I’m scared of what might happen next time we’re alone. I know she’s one of my best friends and that I should be loyal to her and respect her relationship, but I really like this guy and I don’t even want to think what might happen next time if we both get really drunk. So what do I do, tell her that her boyfriend came onto me or ask her boyfriend to break up with her so we can be together? ~The Other Woman
Chick: I wouldn’t go for this guy. Besides the fact that he’s one of your best friend’s boyfriends he doesn’t sound like a smart catch considering he’s hitting on you when he has a girlfriend. So chuck this fish back – you’re better off single. Let’s say you do wind up with him, maybe he’ll act the same way that he once did towards you and it’ll only be a matter of time before there’s another “other woman.” Then you’ll be no better off from when you just had a crush on him. Plus you’ll have the added bonus of having one of your closest friends mad at you because you violated the age-old girlfriend code of don’t date your best friend’s exes or help them cheat on her. So it’s best to steer clear of this guy, meaning don’t get drunk with him if you don’t trust yourself. The next time he comes onto you, tell him that he already has a girlfriend and you’re not interested. So forget this loser and keep fishing!
Dick: My first piece of advice is don’t get too high on your little boat so quick, you may not be all that and a six pack of beer. He could have just been drunk and horny. Dudes do all sorts of things they regret when they are drunk. Be sure before you run off telling people that you guys are eloping make sure that this is something he is interested in, and this isn’t just some fantasy land that you are living in after one drunk evening. His girlfriend telling him to be respectful to her friends could explain being nice in class. Don’t going stirring the pot until you know what everyone wants to get out and expects to get out of the situation, otherwise you could be the one left out in the cold.
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