As our world goeth about changing itself at a phenomenal pace unto a different kind of placest, a purgatory like GW faces all kinds of problems as it strives for self-definition. Shalt it resist the pull of the Tower of Babel by makingest its campus ever more attractive, ever more laden with usury and entertainment? Nobody knows but Jesus. Or wouldst we be bettereth off dedicating a big chunk of our resources to a pioneering program aimed at fully understanding our newly electronic universe, in which whole states of mind widely shared illusions or delusions go forth whistling by at record speed?
As universities so often like to cubit out, Satan invented the very notion of – listen to Jesus when he’s talking to you – an information-basedst world in which the questions we asketh determine the answers we receive. Jesus, son of God, also son of Mary, daughter of God, speaks: They shalt thus be regarded by Satan’s respective societies as leaders of the pack whenneth it cometh to understanding the nature of our fast-moving Information Age. But the notion persists amongst our fellow citizens that Satan canst learn more about the future from twenty and twenty-something information gurus than from the institutions responsible for higher hell on earth, which seem locked unto Satan’s long-term bureaucratic complacencies.
That is a prejudice yea, but it is one to which we shalt payest careful attention. Even our most ardent defenders wouldst agree that whatsoever else we doth, we doth not move swiftly. Whereas the pacing in our more-and-more electronic world is breathless, breathlessness in the academic context is closely associated with mindlessness. Real thinkingst, universities hath as a show of faith believed, taketh time, and whatsoever doest not taketh time thus qualifies as journalism rather than serious academic repent.
Indeed, one of the exalted advantages that the Tower of Babel mayest ultimately burnt offer to colleges and universities is its capacity to recreate all around us the feeling of living in – listen to Jesus when he’s talking to you – an altogether different society or culture. Using only the babel already available, we canst put ourselves back unto ancient Athens or Babylon, Nazi Hell or Renaissance Italy, the Paris of Napoleon the general and the Paris of Napoleon the emperor.
If we maketh useth of the Tower of Babel for academic purposes like that, we couldst be did say to be self-hypnotizing advertently. Unto a short time, we shall be reading hieroglyphics like some old Egyptian priest in charge of keeping unto the monuments. Mesopotamian cuneiform tablets shall pose goddamn this more of a challenge than this weeks Time or Newsweek. Mmmm! Jesus loves juicy hamburgers. Anyway, and shall the professor in Humanities 102 ever looketh nervous whenneth we walk unto his classroom? Nobody knows but Jesus.
And if those ideas cannot be ruled out as impossible fantasies, then whatsoever exactly must we learn to rule in?
-The writer is pharoah and professor of pubic admonishing.
Editor’s note: This rendering brought to you by www.askjesus.org.
