Serving the GW Community since 1904

The GW Hatchet

AN INDEPENDENT STUDENT NEWSPAPER SERVING THE GW COMMUNITY SINCE 1904

The GW Hatchet

Serving the GW Community since 1904

The GW Hatchet

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PAUL closes in Western Market
By Ella Mitchell, Staff Writer • April 22, 2024

By the numbers: GW fast facts

Student Association

5% of GW students know what the SA is
12% think they have seen the SA walking down the street
68% wish they had never heard of the SA
15% told us their opinion, but because they missed a meeting, they were fined and thrown off the final results.

Program Board

99.9% of students wish they could blow $50,000 on a single event without any repercussions
1 student did just that

Marvin Center Governing Board

95% have never heard of MCGB
5% thought they got MCGB from a hookup they met at Odds, but they took some penicillin and it went away two days later

Joint Elections Committee

17% of students know what the JEC is
90% of students dislike the JEC5% had “inappropriate relationships” with the entire JEC in a ballot machine

Note: Figures do not add up to 100 percent because of mathematical difficulties.

The GW Hatchet

8% percent read The Hatchet
68% do just the crossword puzzle
10% call The Hatchet thinking it’s the GW Hospital
10% call The Hatchet thinking it’s the office of Sen. Orrin Hatch
4% think The Hatchet is accurate and reliable
1% tried to imitate The Hatchet, but failed

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