Reader's note: This story is satirical in nature and published in a spoof issue.
April 4, 1992
Panhellenic Association votes to relax dress code rules for sororities. Push-up bras and hip-huggers are made the only requirement.
April 2, 1999
Men's basketball team wins 3,215th NCAA tournament. GW votes to erect new building to house all the trophies.